My guest today is Dai Manuel an award-winning digital thought leader and author, Distinguished Toastmaster & keynote speaker, former partner and Chief Operating Officer of a multi-million dollar retail company, and a sought after lifestyle mentor and executive performance coach.
I had a great time interviewing him and we talk about his journey as a coach, entrepreneur and super dad.
Dai is on a mission to positively impact one million role models around the globe to lead a FUN-ctionally fit life through education, encouragement, and community.
He is an, Accountability coach, good friend to a lot of people and is here to help others get healthy.
- Join the free 28-day Whole Life Fitness Manifesto program and learn how to maximize your body, mind, and spirit in 30 minutes a day. www.joinwlfm.com
- 5 Day Sugar Detox Resource & Challenge - www.daimanuel.com/sugardetox
- Ultimate resource (no sign up required) www.daimanuel.com/gift
- The 99 Bodyweight Workout Guide www.DaiManuel.com/99
- How to Develop a Positive Mindset www.daimanuel.com/positive-mindset
- My First 10 Clients Blueprint - www.myfirst10clients.com
Other links & mentions:
RECOMMENDED BOOK - Essentialism by Greg McCowan
- (00:00:23) - Introduction of my guest today
- (00:07:45) - Loss of revenue and pivoting to get through 2020 Covid crisis and impact it's had on Dai's coaching business.
- (00:11:09) - Prioritising what projects to dedicate resources towards
- (00:15:00) - Book recommendation - Essentialism by Greg McCowan
- (00:17:07) - Capacity to do stuff, re-allocation of energy and having a plan B
- (00:20:44) - Dai story how they decided to leave their careers, go super minimalistic and got traveling the world with kids
- (00:25:12) - Where did the revenue come from while Dai and the family were on the read traveling
- (00:32:59) - Is minimalistic freedom lifestyle for you ?
- (00:37:41) - My story of self actualisation when I decided to move to Australia
- (00:40:59) - Getting outside your comfort zone, Dai shares how overcome obesity and suicidal thoughts as a teen
- (00:48:48) - What really needed to happen for Dai to realise that he needed a drastic change otherwise he'll never be happy
- (00:54:56) - How is Dai keeping relationship with his wife fresh and still dating like
- (00:57:41) - One simple strategy to help you get started with your weightloss
- (01:00:22) - Dai's details if you want to get in touch
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Vit Muller: [00:00:23] all right, everybody. Uh, thank you for tuning into this show. Uh, my guest today is an award-winning digital thought leader and author distinguished Toastmaster, which is a business networking organization. He's also a keynote speaker, former partner.
[00:00:38] And chief operating officer at a multimillion dollar retail company. Pardon me and assault after lifestyle mentor and executive performance coach.
[00:00:49] That aside, he's also super dad. I like the way he's pitching it, he's dating his wife. It's a really cool with a lead by example, way of living and contagious personality.
[00:00:59] He's on the mission to positively impact 1 million role models around the globe to lead a fun fit life through education, encouragement, and community.
[00:01:12] My guest. He is an accountability. Coach is a good friend to a lot of people and he's here to help others get healthy. Please. Welcome to the show. Dai Manuel
Dai Manuel: [00:01:26] what's up
Vit Muller: [00:01:30] man.
Dai Manuel: [00:01:31] Awesometo be here. Man, I don't even remember. I think we talked initially, maybe six months ago. Yeah. It's been a long time ago, so it's so good that we're here. We're here. We're actually, it's doing it. It's happening?
Vit Muller: [00:01:43] Yeah, man. It's been awhile. It's been in one. We had, uh, we, we, we, we, we tried to do it. What is it like a month ago?
[00:01:49] And then when we couldn't make it work and now we're here that's that's awesome, man. So what's been happening in your world since last time we spoke.
Dai Manuel: [00:01:55] Well, you know, We're now done summer in our part of the world. You know, I'm in North America now, but previously.
Vit Muller: [00:02:01] Whoop whoop.. Bring on Summer in Australia!
Dai Manuel: [00:02:04] I know you're going into summer. I'm getting ready to go into winter. And, uh, I miss my perpetual summer, you know, the last two and a half years, my, my family, and I've been living in Bali, Indonesia. So we were almost neighbors for a bit. And, uh, so, but we rotate, relocated back to camp for our kids to finish high school here. So yeah, this year has been one of those interesting years.
[00:02:25] Cause obviously like everybody we've been dealing with the pandemic, right? Like this COVID-19 thing. And so navigating that this year has been interesting because at the end of the year, my business got kicked in the nuts, you know, like it was like 80% of my revenue was like literally gone. I was on pace to have a record year.
[00:02:41] I was like, man, this is gonna be awesome. And then within the matter of eight weeks, it was like 80% revenue gone and a lot of my forecasted revenue gone. And so it sort of put me in a position where I had a little bit of a pity party for a couple of days. And, uh, but then I got my head out of my butt and I was like, okay, well, what can I do.
[00:02:59] What can we do? How can I change things? You know, what can I do right now to, to keep moving forward? And, uh, so I pivoted a bit and, um, yeah, you know, like everybody, we just, we, you, you adapt, right. Um, we can get through this. And, uh, so that's what I did. I doubled down on some of the things that I could do and I had access to, and, uh, Pivoted and changed some of my programs and the way I was serving people shifted as well, all for the better, because I actually, you know, then we came, edited it into to July, August, and, uh, man, just things just picked up like huge.
[00:03:32] And now I'm projecting to do more than what I was predicting before. So you know what? It's all good. Things are good again. Um, but you know, you never know what's going to happen. That's this world that we live in that's life. The only thing I know is that nothing stays as is. Things change all the time.
[00:03:48] And so I just try to be really aware of that and not try to fight that so much because I find every time I tried to fight change and nothing good ever happens. So, so yeah, that's, that's the bit on me, man.
Vit Muller: [00:04:00] You either, you either try to fight change or your, or sticking your hand in the sand. Neither works, right.
[00:04:07] That's right.
Dai talks about his business and his fitness background [00:04:08] That's true. So true. You're just beating yourself against the head for those Alyssa. I know what you do, but for the guys listening, can you, you just unravel a little bit, what you do, you know, we talk about, you know, your revenues or what are your, like, in terms of like your revenue stream of what services do you provide and how does it all work?
[00:04:24] How does that Dai Manuel empire work?
Dai Manuel: [00:04:27] Well, you know, I come from a retail background, so I I've been in the fitness and wellness industry, working either as a trainer coach, all sorts of different jobs, even as spin instructor for a period of time. Uh, and I that's sort of what I got started with. And then I got into equipment sales, uh, and that would have been 22 years ago now.
[00:04:46] Uh, so I was in my early twenties at the time and I had a knack for it. It was my first time being in a commissioned environment. So a performance based pay structure. So those that are listening to this, if you're in a position where you, you, you put w well, basically you're put into a position where the more people you impact positively more organizations, you positively impact, you know, You make more money?
[00:05:08] I mean, that's the way I looked at it. It was like every morning I wake up, it's like, how many lives am I going to change today? You know? And the more lives I changed and impacted positively, the more money you made, it was like, wow, this is a win-win man. I like this. And, uh, I had an act for it. I really enjoyed it.
[00:05:21] So I was selling people, finished equipment, accessories, supplements, apparel. Um, and I was very fortunate. I, the, the guy that was the owner and CEO, uh, Took a liking to me, he recognized that there was something in me that reminded him of himself. He was 20 years my senior. So he took me under his wing. He was my first true business mentor.
[00:05:38] And just really, I was a sponge just started sucking it up. And, uh, during that period, you know, we branched off from the corporate company and then formed our own and, uh, did that for 17 years. Yeah, it was amazing. I loved it. And we grew it to eight retail locations, a couple of B2B enterprises. Uh, we, we did a lot of manufacturers overseas and import and export, um, you know, just, and, and also a fairly successful e-commerce business that sold all across Canada.
[00:06:03] So, uh, I learned a lot. You can imagine 17 years of doing that. And, uh, I was, when I left, I was really the chief operating officer, as well as chief marketing officer. Uh, and, but I read this book called crush it by Gary Vaynerchuk and I'm just totally dating myself, but it was 14 years ago. I read the very first printing and, uh, uh, itch my perspective on marketing and the way that we do business.
[00:06:27] And I'm glad that I embraced that learning and starting to building my own personal plot. So we had a corporate platform, but I had my own opinions. My own belief systems. And I knew that I couldn't share my own beliefs on the corporate channel. Cause it just, it wouldn't, it, it would compliment it, but it was also kind of clashing because I'm a big calisthenics guy.
[00:06:46] I like a lot of body weight movements and you can imagine it. Right. I'm a bodyweight movement kind of guy calisthenics, but where do I make my income selling fitness equipment? Well, it creates a little bit of a, well, it's a, it's a challenging dichotomy, right? And so it kind of ruffled a bit of feathers within our organization, but eventually we moved past it and, uh, Uh, I was fortunate cause I'd built this personal brand and my personal brand involves, you know, keynote speaking, facilitating workshops, retreats, uh, but also a lot of stuff in the digital space, a lot of programs, courses, um, it's a lot of thought leadership type stuff.
[00:07:21] Um, but I also do a lot of executive coaching and entrepreneurial coaching. So, uh, I just help people get out of their own way and create better results. With less effort and, uh, that's the power of having a great coach, you know, a great mentor that you can work with. So, so that's sort of my picture snapshot now, you know, I've been doing that.
[00:07:37] Full-time as my main thing for the last five years after I transitioned away from my previous business. So, uh, yeah, that's it, man. Now.
Loss of revenue and pivoting to get through 2020 Covid crisis and impact it's had on Dai's coaching business.
Vit Muller: [00:07:45] Back to this year. So you mentioned you pivot so before. COVID obviously a lot of speaking gigs as well. Um, as well as coaching or lineup, I would, I would expect. But what was the main thing that you had to pivot now that, like you said, you've lost a bit of revenue?
[00:07:59] Um, I assume that was probably the speaking stuff.
Dai Manuel: [00:08:03] A lot of speaking gigs were like last year I did a dozen keynotes and they pay really, really well for the amount of time that goes into it. I mean, I always tell people, you know, I've been working on my speaking ability for 10 years, so yes, I might get paid a very.
[00:08:17] Fair amount for, for what I speak, but you have to recognize it's also 10 years of a lot of working to get to that point. I always like to let people know that it's not like all of a sudden it was like, Oh, this massive revenue stream. It took a lot of effort and just consistency and patience. And, uh, but it got to a point where I finally, I felt like, all right, This is a significant part of my revenue.
[00:08:37] Um, and then all of a sudden you know move back to North America was going to be great because a lot of the things that I used to say no to, or it wasn't really no, I said yes, but, uh, some of the speaking and speaking opportunities I had, they didn't have the budget for travel travel outside of North America.
[00:08:53] Sorry, let me qualify that because I was living in Bali, right? So, uh, the only time I was come back to North America for speaking gigs is when you know, it was a real. Significant event where they had the budget to, to pay the extra, to fly me in and out from balls.
[00:09:05] Otherwise you're going to break even almost, or
[00:09:09] I could still do it on my own.
[00:09:10] Um, but it just, I have to ask myself, you know, cause the travel, but it's also the, you know, how it is traveling overseas? It can be really challenging. And especially with myself with my health, I, it takes me a few days. That minimally like, well, actually the Bali, like going from Southeast Asia to North America and I live in Vancouver, which is like the further side West coast of North America, man, I get hammered.
[00:09:32] Like I just, it just takes me a long time to recover. So I have to ask myself, you know, I got a lot of days where I have to recover and you know, not productive and it's all the travel time. So I really have to value my time. And so there were some events that are, if I could do a bunch of them all at once, it made it a lot more worth my while.
[00:09:50] Um, But that, that part of my business just disappeared. Like it did. Like I had a lot of forecasted events that I was booked in for. I was like, excited. It's going to be great. I'm back in North America now. So I've got a lot more opportunity. Uh, and then it was gone. It was like literally gone. And, uh, also a lot of my business coaching clients were people that I was supporting in developing their own platforms, taking what they do offline, bringing it online.
[00:10:13] Right. A lot of people do amazing things offline. It's like, man, you know what you do, you can monetize that online. And so I would often help them with that bridging and, uh, A lot of them were event based people. Uh, so you can imagine it was like, I can't really do coaching right now because literally my a hundred percent of my business that was forecasted for this year just yeah.
[00:10:32] Went away, you know? And I'm like, and that's a tough thing to pivot through, you know? And so, uh, I saw that also that income disappeared. Um, so it was, it was significant. I I'm just like, wow, this is.Was not planned for that, you know,
Vit Muller: [00:10:50] on that note, on that note, that those clients that were looking to transition from speaking to online and you were looking to help them, did you do find some because the thing is while their income, as you know, was gone, no speaking, just like for you, but they were looking to transition.
[00:11:05] In a way. So it makes sense to actually use that time to transition.
Prioritising what projects to dedicate resources towards
[00:11:09] Did you find anybody that was willing to transition?
[00:11:12] Because obviously it's, it's a, um, there's a fear, like you will no income and now you're, you're actually ought to spend more, to do the transition. Sometimes that's what we have to do. Right.
[00:11:24] Did you have, did you have a couple of those?
Dai Manuel: [00:11:25] Yeah. It, it, some just, you know, the fear was overwhelming for some, and I get that and you know, there's no, you can talk through that all you want, but if you're paralyzed and unable, unable to take action because of that, that fear, uh, you know, that's something that sometimes it's better just to pause.
[00:11:43] And reflect, regroup, reset, whatever you want to say, you know, before you relaunch. And so for some of them, and some of them have come back now since, but they needed a good period of time just to be like, Oh my gosh, I got to get my bearings. You know? Like it's just because there is, uh, for, for a lot of people, I mean, to pardon the cliche, but it's like the wind gets knocked out of your sails as they say, right?
[00:12:03] Like it's, it is really hard for a lot of people. I still have a lot of friends that their businesses are still really suffering. You know, and, and they've had to even go out and look at doing other things that they'd done in the past, you know, get, get four new jobs, you know, to sort of bridge the gap right now between this, this period of time.
[00:12:20] Uh, so I, I don't take any of that lightly. Like I, yeah. Oh my gosh. It's, it's, it's challenging. We're, we're facing a lot of challenges in the world, but, but I do find that a lot of. People were very successful at pivoting and they were very realistic in, in the pivot itself, you know, w when it came to setting even financial goals around that, it's like, okay, well, how much am I willing to invest?
[00:12:40] And a lot of times it's just time, right? It's time and your own personal energy. It's not necessarily a monetary investment, but you have to recognize taking time away to do that means you're taking it away from something else. And if that other thing has been your primary income stream, you know, there's just that fear.
[00:12:55] It's like, well, I don't have any income over here yet. And I'm losing it over here, but I'm afraid if I turn my attention away from where my money's been coming from in the past, doing the things that I've always been doing it with a certain expectation. Yeah. That, you know, I might get to a point where I can't come back from it, you know?
[00:13:12] And that's just a fear. It's a concern. I get it. Like, she shouldn't trust me for a few weeks there. I was panicking a lot, you know, I was like, what am I gonna do? Like, am I gonna have to go out and look for a job? You know, I'm like, Oh boy, you know, and I haven't had a job for like 25 years, you know? So I'm like, Oh, neck.
[00:13:27] So anyways,
Vit Muller: [00:13:28] We just spoke about it before, before we started recording. Right. I was talking about the same thing. Right. I totally, I totally agree. It's it's hard, especially when you have that, you know, when you don't have much going on, you've got a couple of things and you need to rely on that income.
[00:13:42] But at the same time, you're trying to build some new things for new revenue streams that are kind of in a way safer things that you learn as a result of the COVID stuff. Like probably going more digitally going more online. It's probably a safe bet. Uh, but it it's, it's, it's, it's really, it's not about the money, it's the time.
[00:14:00] And how do you, and, and how do you balance it out? How much time can you give and how many projects can you take on? Right. I was still working for those of you guys listening. I was talking about a couple of things that we've got, you know, Came up and opportunities, you know? And, um, I can't take them all.
[00:14:16] I have to basically, yeah, just, I just had to take step back and rethink. Okay. I just want to be consistent with this podcast. I want to be consistent with the managing the gym that I'm working with. And couple of little other things, but aside of that, I can't really take that much on otherwise that just, it just, um, um, what's the word?
[00:14:36] Performance just goes down.
Dai Manuel: [00:14:37] You're right.
[00:14:38] Kind of production as well. Right? Like you can only produce so much the production of your brainpower. Right? You've
Vit Muller: [00:14:43] got a certain, uh, certain, uh, um, uh, uh, capacity a day. And, and if you work 10 hours straight, Doing an intensive task. I mean, you can't expect to be good at the end of the day to try and squeeze another two hours for another side project when you're already fried.
Book recommendation - Essentialism by Greg McCowan
Dai Manuel: [00:15:00] Yeah. And, and you know what, for anybody that's struggling with what we're talking about right now, um, there's a book that I highly recommend it it's called Essentialism by Greg McCowan and, uh, just a phenomenal book. Like he he's like just whole next level, but he's got this beautiful way of just helping people filter through.
[00:15:19] Not only opportunities, but, but also just. Our life, you know, cause a lot of time we, we do find ourselves afraid of missing out, you know, as they call it FOMO. Uh, it's very real. And we feel like if we say no to something it's drastic, it's like, Oh no, this is going to be really bad if I say no. So I can just got to say yes to everything until the point where you're just like, why am I doing this?
[00:15:43] You know, when you start to see regression in, in every area of your life. And so his, the whole thing is just getting that clarity. Yeah, because you, you know, clarity on what's a yes. And what's a no, and there's no room for anything in between. No maybes, like it's eliminating the maybes or, or the not right now, but maybe later kind of thing, you know, like, uh, don't we find ourselves something saying that it's like, Oh, that sounds like a great idea.
[00:16:06] You know what let's, let's revisit this next month and the next month comes and it's like, Oh, you know, and you've got somebody telling you, like, I, I find a lot of time. My, my gut instinct is when I don't listen to it. I have the biggest problems. Uh, but, but our instincts, I think are, are usually on point.
[00:16:22] If we're very clear about what our businesses are, what, where we want to be investing our time. It's a lot easier to say no. And to say yes, because we can filter much more effectively if you don't have that clarity in your own business and in your own life. Oh boy, it's challenging. Right? Because without clarity, we don't have confidence.
[00:16:42] And if we don't have confidence, man, we become very good procrastinators. We put things off and we just don't take action. And if you're not taking action, nothing happens. You know? So it's, it's amazing, but so it's a great book and I recommend it. Or if you don't want to read the book, um, Tim Ferris, it did an amazing interview with Greg McCowan and he pretty much talks about the whole book in it.
Capacity to do stuff, re-allocation of energy and having a plan B
[00:17:07] we all want to be successful in one shape way or form as well, but it's always comes back to that question of capacity.
Dai Manuel: [00:17:14] That's right.
Vit Muller: [00:17:14] What's your, what's your capacity. And, and we're not just talking to money and time there's often, does it hear like, Oh, you know, don't make excuses.
[00:17:21] If you, you know, if you have a look at your day, you probably wasting time away and doing little things like, you know, watching Netflix or things like that. but also it comes back to your, your brain capacity because you can't expect yourself to work and just work. Yeah, for me, like just time to take in time away to, to, to, to switch off my brain so that I can be fresh after certain period of time having, uh, having, having that break exercise is one.
[00:17:48] Right. But the, also the other thing is also what you're willing to sacrifice. Right. Trying to build a business. Like, I mean, you, you, in a day you do have to shift focus, but if you've got a family, that's a tricky one. Yeah.
Dai Manuel: [00:18:04] Yeah. I get what you're saying there. And the idea of sacrifice, because I think a lot of people, you know, like even, I guess it comes down to, I mean, we could have this whole linguistic debate, right?
[00:18:14] Like, what is. Sacrifice means to you is what it means to me. You know, you can get into that kind of a philosophical debate. But I think a lot of times when we think sacrifice, most of us think that I do need to do this. This is what I have to do, but it's. Not like we're losing something, right. It's like, I'm doing something that I don't really want to do, but I wanted, I'm going to do it anyways.
[00:18:33] Do you know what I mean? Like it's, I'm, I'm making the sacrifice. I'm a martyr, I'm giving up my Netflix hours so I can build my dream, you know, and I don't think it's that it's a reallocation of energy and it's a, uh, Totally. You have to have complete awareness of what you're choosing to do, but then there's that huge amount of accountability.
[00:18:52] And self-accountability, it's got to come into play. It's like I've said to myself that this is something that I want to accomplish and here's why I want to accomplish it. You know, it's like I wanted to leave my former career. You know, but I also knew that in order to do that, I needed to have a certain business, at least in place that I have a little bit of money coming in because I didn't have a plan B you know, when I left my career, I was at the top of my game.
[00:19:15] Like I was like, people are like, what are you doing? Crazy man. You crazy. You're leaving that you've been there 17 years. You finally got things at the place where it's just like autopilot and you're leaving, like why? And I was like, because I don't like doing it anymore. I want more lifestyle. I want more time with family.
[00:19:33] I want time to travel. I, you had all these other things I wanted to do
Vit Muller: [00:19:36] and you couldn't ride because that was taking your time away.
Dai Manuel: [00:19:38] Absolutely, exactly well said. And that's exactly the case, you know, and I was realizing I was compromising. On a lot of my quality of life based on what I was earning now.
[00:19:51] And, and I didn't want to be thinking about 10, 20 years down the road when my kids are starting to have kids. And I'm like looking at my wife thinking, you know, that time when we thought about that crazy idea of pulling the kids out of school and going traveling, I really wish we did that. I did not want to be that guy.
[00:20:08] You know, I don't want to be the dude looking back saying, I really wish I did that thing. Um, I'd rather say I tried. And Hey, I learned a lot through the experience
Vit Muller: [00:20:18] and let's talk about that. Let's talk about that. Cause that is, that's the first thing that you you've pitched to me when you contacted me the first time, like what you did, what?
[00:20:25] Oh man, that's a, that sounds pretty appealing. I go definitely like a look into that. So for the listeners who don't know what Dai has done, you basically wrapped up a corporate gig. And in a nutshell, you, you, you packed up the corporate gig, you packed up the suitcases and you and your family. You went travel the world.
Dai Manuel: [00:20:41] Yeah.
Vit Muller: [00:20:41] I'll leave the rack when I leave the rest of you.
Dai story how they decided to leave their careers, go super minimalistic and got traveling the world with kids
Dai Manuel: [00:20:44] So, so yeah, so here's the deal, right? Like, and it took. Almost, I guess, about 18 months, really? From the time that I finally got to the point where like, yeah, we're doing this, like my wife was dripping on me for a long time. Cause she loves to travel.
[00:20:59] And she always said, you know, it would be amazing when we have a family together. If we could travel together, you know, to really teach our kids do that kind of experience. Um, in essence life schooling, you know, because we tried the homeschooling thing, it didn't work for our family. So we like to pitch the whole life schooling or road schooling, you know, schooling on the road or through life.
[00:21:19] Uh, but, uh, long and short of it finally got to that point where I'm like, yeah, you know, I really want to do this. I'm not happy on this path anymore. I see where the direction I'm going. Sure. I can be very comfortable, but I'm not feeling satisfied. I'm not feeling fulfilled. I have all these dreams and visions of things I want to do and do with my family do on my own.
[00:21:38] And it's not going to be fulfilled if I keep doing what I'm doing right now. So that's a very scary place to be. You know, I just want to acknowledge that because I think a lot of people are in that place. They're like, man, I really like to do something else. Cause I just don't love what I'm doing. And it's like, you know, you get up in the morning.
[00:21:51] It's like, ah, I don't want to get up. And you know, you're not excited about getting up and doing what you're about to do. And so I got to that point and I was like, okay, it's time for change. You know? Um, so making that decision was great. And then we had to sort of work into it cause I was in a very senior role.
[00:22:10] So that had to be a gradual transition over to just the
Vit Muller: [00:22:13] succession planning and all
Dai Manuel: [00:22:14] exactly. And just, just ensuring that the company is looked after, you know, like, cause I was gonna leave a hole there, but by the time I left, you know, there wasn't a hole and they were all good and I know they don't miss me and I don't miss them.
[00:22:24] So it's all good. But, but we got to that point where, okay, it's the last day. So I basically quit my gig a month after that my wife quit hers. And now we're like, okay, we really got to figure this out because we've lost your income. We've lost my income. You know, those, those salaries that we were very accustomed to receiving a couple of months after that, we finally pulled the kids out of school.
[00:22:46] Cause we're like, okay, we're doing this. We're going traveling. And then we had a month and a half, almost two months to basically get rid of all our stuff and tie up any loose ends. And uh, and then we literally what we could not fit into the back of her SUV. If it didn't fit, we got rid of it. And we went very minimalist.
[00:23:04] So some may be familiar if you haven't seen that. Uh, the minimalist documentary on Netflix, check it out. It's great. It's very inspiring, but it's intimidating going through the process because if you're someone that's got a lot of stuff, Our stuff has a lot of emotional value to us, you know? And that was the issue, right.
[00:23:19] Was I looked at things and, and I don't know when you look at things, maybe you don't look at it this way, but when I look at things like even like this water bottle and it's like, okay, well, this water bottle represents a certain amount of time and energy that I had to invest to create the revenue or the money to then go and acquire this thing.
[00:23:37] So. When I started looking around her house and taking inventory of all this stuff that we were going to have to downsize and get rid of, because I mean, we can not take an, a traveling with us. That's just not an option. And we didn't want to put it in storage. Cause really it's not stuff you would put in storage.
[00:23:50] Right? We put the momentos irreplaceable stuff like photos and photo albums and you know, certain things that have real emotional value that we can't replace, but everything else is fair game. Just get rid of this stuff. But I was having a really hard time with that. Like really hard to, and I was like, Oh God, if I ever want that again, I'm going to have to go and do work.
[00:24:07] And then I'm going to have to create that, that, that money. And so is the energy attached to things that was really hard for me. And, uh, but then as soon as I've worked through that and I started to really be mindful and aware of ehow much this stuff was controlling me, I got to a point where it's like, you know what?
[00:24:23] I just don't care anymore. I'm actually excited to unload all this crap because I don't want to be emotionally connected to this stuff anymore and feel dependent on it. And so working through, and that's why I just think always encourage people. It's like, listen, if you got, you're just, you know, if you're one of those people that moves from a place to place.
[00:24:40] And you're carrying boxes with you and they don't get unpacked from place to place. Chances are you got stuff to get rid of. Okay. And, and, you know, there's emotional baggage on this one too, but we won't go down that path right now. But, uh, you know, so getting rid of all that stuff, and then we packed up the SUV.
[00:24:55] Like literally with, with the stuff that we decided to keep. And we just started heading South. We were chasing the sun, my man, like chasing the sun, you know, headed down to California and, uh, hung out there for a bit and traveled all around and then eventually overseas. So, uh, that, that was it. In a nutshell, we, we did it, but I, and I was figuring out my business as we were going.
Where did the revenue come from while Dai and the family were on the read traveling
[00:25:12] So we had enough coming in and I want people to realize this. We were not independently wealthy. I had made some bad investments. We had lost some money. Um, we also invested it to self-finance the publication of my own book with a publisher, rather than because I wanted to retain all the rights to my IP.
[00:25:28] I wanted all that. So I, because I didn't know, that's the thing that you do, a book deals. Great. You get a check upfront, but they own it. You don't own it. You know, and, uh, I didn't want to give that up. You know, this is my stuff is my life. I'm not going to sell this to you. I don't care how much you give me.
[00:25:42] So we invested a lot of money in that process. And, uh, but I had enough coming in from the online stuff. I was doing enough that. We could basically travel indefinitely with that kind of a revenue coming in, you know, like really, I mean, we're not living large. We're not like going to five star hotels and all that stuff.
[00:25:59] I mean, we were living within our means and, and still had a little bit of extra money at the end of the month. And so yeah, when, when you actually look at what do you really need versus what do you want? There's a very, very, there's a big difference typically between those two things. So again, back to clarity, With clarity comes confidence.
[00:26:18] And when you feel confident, it's a lot easier to just follow through on things. Isn't it?
Vit Muller: [00:26:21] Yeah. Would you say it was that freedom? That's freedom lifestyle, I guess it's, that's what appealing to me. That's I think that's the richness of it. It's not really about having the money. I think having the, having the time to, to have time.
[00:26:33] To be free to do what you want to travel right
Dai Manuel: [00:26:35] We're just letting collectors, not of stuff, experiences. Yeah. That's the way my wife always puts in. I, I love how that it resonates with me. You know,
Vit Muller: [00:26:43] I always remember any, any holiday I tag with my partner and it's like, it's those memories that you cherish, the memories that stuck with you, that sort of makes you, you know, brew some coffee sometime, and just sit in a, and just look at the stars and just think that dying back and just.
[00:26:57] That's that's, that's the real value. Right. But let me just take you back a little bit because, um, I've got a couple of questions and I'm sure some listeners listening to this and they're like, Oh man, this is awesome. I want to do it, but I've got all these questions you mentioned, get rid of your stuff.
[00:27:13] Do you mean selling? Did you sell your house as well?
Dai Manuel: [00:27:16] Uh, so at the, we'd already sold our place a while back. Um, and then we'd been reinvesting back into our businesses and, uh, so we were leasing a place. Um, so we ended up subleasing the place, but everything that was in the space we had to get rid of, you know, so like furniture and just all the big stuff we just.
[00:27:33] Got rid of, and it was really interesting cause at the time, uh, while we were downsizing, literally downsizing our lifestyle. So we can adopt this minimalist lifestyle and start traveling. Uh, there was actually a lot of refugees coming in, um, specifically from Syria, uh, to Canada and Vancouver was one of the heirs and we had a friend that was, uh, going around collecting free goods from people to help set these people up with their own places.
[00:27:56] And so we were like, okay, well, you know, cause we tried selling some stuff, but it was getting down to the wire and like, you know what? I. I don't care. I'm already checked out. I just want to be gone over this and done with it. And so they came in and took it all away for us. It was great. So it ended up working out really well for us.
[00:28:10] They got set up with some good stuff. We got the freedom of, of space and that mental space, especially to unload that stuff. And then, uh, everything else was just, you know, pack up the SUV with some suitcases and the way we went, you know, and, uh, but yeah, it, it was, uh, quite the experience, you know, going through that downsizing process.
[00:28:30] It's very freeing. Very freeing. Uh, but also I do like people know I was also stressed and there was some arguments between my wife and I, you know, like for sure, sure.
Vit Muller: [00:28:43] My other question was, you mentioned, you know, w when you, you quit job and then your wife quit her jumper month, uh, her job a month after that.
[00:28:50] And then you're like, okay, now we're doing it. Now we have to figure it out. Does that mean. That your desk started to planning. Would you plan while this was started? You're still at your job?
[00:28:59] We had no idea
Dai Manuel: [00:28:59] where we were going to go yet. Like we, we are not the kind of people that would sit down and plan out an itinerary.
[00:29:04] We've never been that we are kind of very in the moment figuring things out. We knew that by a certain date, we would not have a roof over our head anymore. Do you know what I mean? Like we, we just wouldn't have, cause we subleased the place. So we knew that, okay, keys are changing hands. We don't have an address now.
[00:29:24] Like we have our SUV, we have the stuff in it, but that's all we got. And what are we going to do? We had an idea that we were going to go South and we were going to go travel around the United States. Cause it was also coming into winter in Canada and we're like, yeah. Okay. The furthest, as we can go with the better, cause we're chasing the sun, chase the warmth, this would be great.
[00:29:42] And we had enough friends cause also at the time had been building online communities and my book was being launched at the same time. So we could sort of coincide and justify that, Hey, we'll do the book launch. We'll, we'll hit some different cities and different bookstores and, and we'll just. Travel around visiting family and friends and using the occasional couch or the Airbnb or the motel six.
[00:30:01] I mean, it didn't really matter. We even camped out a couple of times, but I'm a glamper i, I, I used to camp a lot in my twenties. I can't do it anymore. I've lost that, that, that drive in me to camp. And, uh, so I'm more of a glamper. So I, I do like to have a bed and I like to have running water, you know? So, uh, uh, that, that didn't go over so well, you know, like the camping piece, but, but we did everything else and we just.
[00:30:24] Again, started going. And, uh, but for me, I was still doing some speaking engagements and I would negotiate in there that they would fly me from wherever I was to, to wherever I needed to be in back. So sometimes they would find me back to a different city. My wife with my kids would meet me there, you know, they would just continue their driving and, uh, I would just fly into another place.
[00:30:41] And, uh, so yeah, it was, it was kinda neat. You know, it was a lot of fun having that flexibility. Um, But we didn't plan anything, you know, like it was pretty interesting cause it was also fearful because my, my money coming in was very inconsistent. I was up and down all the time. And so that also makes forecasting and planning pretty challenging when you're just like, ah, I don't know if I have money for that, you know, it was like, Oh yeah, well give me a Disneyland.
[00:31:06] We can be there for a week. I mean, Oh boy, what are we gonna do? You know? Well, we would figure it out, make it happen, you know? And, uh, so it, you know, we, we trusted that we had enough to, to make things work and, uh, and. There's an exercise. I don't know if you relate to this one, but, uh, Tim Ferriss again, uh, in his Ted talk talks about fear setting this idea of really rationalizing through your fear.
[00:31:31] And so we would often have a dialogue, my wife, and I want you to say that like, well, what is the worst thing that can happen by us doing this? Like, what is the worst? What is the worst thing that could happen? You know, besides losing our lives. I mean, that would be really bad, but I mean, really, as far as what we're doing and.
[00:31:46] Because we're capable of people. W w what is the worst? And we're like, you know what? We got families, they got homes. They love us. Worst case scenario. We run out of money. We go home, we settle in, we get jobs. We rebuild, you know, we just go again, like we knew that we're very employable. People were very skilled and talented and we can be an asset for any team that we're a part of.
[00:32:07] So worst thing is we might have to transition back into how we were living before that's okay. No big deal, you know, and, uh, that was actually the worst thing. So w when we really rationalize through it, Why wouldn't we want to go do this, you know, and give it a try. And, uh, and I'm so grateful that we did that.
[00:32:25] We trusted enough in ourselves to just say, yeah, you know what? Let's just go for it. And, uh, yeah, we sort of figured things out as well. Yeah,
Vit Muller: [00:32:33] no, that's a good way. You just put it just a rationalizing the fear. Cause I, I was, that was my next thing I was going to ask you is like how. How do you get to that poem that you are ready to do this?
[00:32:44] Because for a lot of people that they like to stability, like the comfort, like the security, right? We talking about the muscle of spearmint. When we talk about Maslow pyramid is that, you know, the, the fundamental things you need to show that roof over your head, steady income and things like that. And then things like.
Is minimalistic freedom lifestyle for you ?
[00:32:59] You did, it's like a things that you do when you're single, that you're more likely to when you're single, not when you have a family and you got the kids. Cause then you think about, you know, your responsibilities towards your kids. Like, so what, what it's, you know, how does, what, what process, what thought processes had to take for you?
[00:33:21] So do this, you know, like, I wonder if there's, if this is for everybody,
Dai Manuel: [00:33:26] well, you know, I don't ever say to everybody that you should do this, you know, like I'm never going to say that, but I always do invite people to really be honest with themselves and say like, is this something that you would want to do?
[00:33:38] You know, and if it is something that you want to do, why wouldn't you do it? Do you know what I mean? Like really what's holding you back. And, and some of the things that are holding people back is just that we're, we're very comfortable. We get into a routine where life is. I don't like to say easy, but it's simple, you know, it's simple, like, you know, where you gotta be tomorrow, you know that you have a steady paycheck income coming in.
[00:34:02] You know, you just, there's a certain reliability to your life. You know, and there's a lot of comfort in that. There is there's absolutely. But you know, I don't need to beat the dead horse here and say that, you know, there's no growth in the comfort zone. We, I mean, I think most people that are. Even having a general introduction to personal or professional development there, they've heard that cliche now, you know, and, but it's founded, I mean, you look in the work of Darwin.
[00:34:31] I mean, he talks about evolution, but he says, you know, and if you look at Darwinism, uh, and it has been proven with science that we need those stressors in our lives, that, that, that state of uncomfortableness is actually where things evolve and they grow. I mean, look at our bodies. We want to talk fitness.
[00:34:47] What do we do time under tension. Right. Like time under tension, the more time under tension. Wow. Look, my body gets stronger. It responds so psychologically, this happens emotionally. This happens to us, not just physically, right. And even spiritually, it, it happens to us, man. I did a 10 day silent retreat of a passionate and I swore I would never do anything that crazy.
[00:35:09] And, you know, 10 days sitting on a pillow, breathing and focusing on memory, I mean, it sounds like. Shoot me now, you know, but I did it and man, it challenged me spiritually, emotionally, physically, psychologically, all facets. But I came out of that shifted different, much different, you know, and, and a different understanding of who I am and some of the mechanisms of why I do certain things like that, that focused.
[00:35:35] Energy in that state of uncomfortableness cha changed me. Okay. And this happens to us all the time in our lives. Right. And so I guess it's really getting, understanding that, okay, I can stay as I am right now. And if you're happy, like really truly, like, I mean this for anyone that's listening to this, if you are happy in your life right now, and you are enjoying what you're doing, why would you change it?
[00:35:59] Isn't that? What we're all working towards. You know, the self-actualization piece that Maslow talks about it and the hierarchy of needs, or you were just referencing, you know, that's when he concerned the pinnacle of that, that ascending, uh, appearance there's this hierarchy of needs. And what is self-actualization?
[00:36:14] Well, it's it in that place where we feel like we're living our life's purpose, you know, we feel aligned with our passion, our purpose. You know, it's working together, Japanese call it our icky guy. You know, it's basically the reason we get up in the morning, but we're excited to get up. We're excited to do what we're about to do.
[00:36:31] And, uh, if you're not in that place right now, I'm just going to ask you, do you want to be in that place? Does that sound like something that you want? Because most of the time when I first meet someone and they're, they're approaching me about working with them to help them. One of the first questions I ask is, Hey, what do you want?
[00:36:46] Like for your life? And they're like, uh, No. One's asked me that before. And I'm like, if you ever asked yourself that, well, yeah, when I was younger, but I mean, I just, I mean, who's got the time to even answer that and I'm like, well, it's a good place to start. You know how important dit is. Right. But listen, I get it.
[00:37:07] I've been there too. Where I didn't know what I want and my past, and when I don't know what I want, and I'm not clear on what I want. That's where I create a lot of space for stuff to go wrong. You know, I find I started slipping in certain things. Even my self care, my mental health stress. It's a slide.
[00:37:24] And just even some of my practices, you know, like my meditation practice, my, my practice of journaling, my gratitudes, you know, or my wins every day, you know, like just these little things, even connecting with some close friends, if I'm not feeling good about myself, it's really hard to, to put the energy out, to connect with others.
My story of self actualisation when I decided to move to Australia
[00:37:41] So, so all these things you create this space. Right? And, uh, so it's, it's just this self-awareness.
Vit Muller: [00:37:48] Yeah, I think everybody wants a, some level of improvement in their life, some level of progression. Right. And perfect point. You said, you know, things happen when you get outside of their comfort zone things.
[00:37:59] Do I know for myself when I left, when I was 18, I left Scotland and worked there and then I decided to move to Australia with nothing and nobody here and huge. An interesting happened. Things happen too, right? You, you sort of, you have to find your feet a little bit of money. I had to have just enough money to pay for my, um, my college.
[00:38:17] I studied, uh, fitness. It was back in 2010
[00:38:21] and you have to find your feet. You have to find some income. So I started working four jobs, but that fear not fear, but the, um, it was almost like a survival instinct in a way. I mean, not really, like I wasn't, no, my life wasn't threatened, but, but I didn't. Depend on anybody.
[00:38:40] And I didn't have my dad's credit card. Put it that way. I just relied on my own. I probably, if I call it the home, I would probably say it. And I mean, I'm in a shit hole and I'd probably get, yeah, my family would probably lend me some money, but I didn't want to do that. I made the decision, I want to do it myself.
[00:38:57] And so I set myself like that way and that, that survival like, Oh, I have to make this, this, this amount of money. And the next three months to pay for my next term fees for the schools.
[00:39:08] I'm also on a student visa. So I'm limited. I can't work more than 20 hours and I want to work more. So just figuring out on the go and out of whole, out of that whole experience, what, what I, what, what, what I realized is that the most amazing opportunities and.
[00:39:28] And the willingness to take, um, to take more risks just came out of that. You know, you just get yourself in that uncomfortable zone.
[00:39:37] You start to work on yourself, you start to, yeah. So I think it's, it's, it's a growth, it's a growth journey and L only good things can come out of it. I mean, I've done some stupid things too, and some business, bad decisions failed, but it's always a learning experience.
[00:39:54] It's so, I mean, I like comfort too. I like comfort. I like having that security. And especially now that I've got a family on the way side of the waves. Sure. I like that security. But on the same token. And I, when I hear stories like yours, like, you know, going into trouble or this, this, this other lady that had, which is going to go out in a couple of weeks later, she did a similar thing.
[00:40:16] She packed everything up shit. She sell the house with a partner and their kid, and they went and bought a, bought it, bought a yacht and they sailed they sailed for 12 months. They sailed Atlantic, Pacific around the world. So it's like, wow, that's, that's so appealing to me. I would, it's not a life I would want to live for the rest of my life, but definitely love to have that experience and do that for 12 months because I know it's not, it's not the fact that I would be on the boat.
[00:40:43] That's not what's appealing. I mean, that's cool too, but it's the getting yourself outside of that comfort zone again. Cause I've been there and I know that. Only positive come out of it. You personally develop, you just grow out of that. So it's, it's so appealing for me anyway.
Getting outside your comfort zone, Dai shares how overcome obesity and suicidal thoughts as a teen [00:40:59] Now getting outside of the comfort zone and speaking of getting outside the comfort zone, you're um, you're very passionate about health and fitness and helping others.
Dai Manuel: [00:41:08] Yeah. Yeah.
Vit Muller: [00:41:10] What led to that?
Dai Manuel: [00:41:12] Well, You want to talk about comfort zones? Well, I was really comfortable from the age of nine to 14. I was so comfortable that I didn't move my body very much played a lot of video games, watched a lot of movies, and I eat a lot of very high calorie foods that with very low nutrition value.
[00:41:29] So you can probably imagine. If you do that every day for a period of five years, you can say it had a negative compounding effect to the point where I was morbidly obese as a teenager, morbidly obese. Okay. Like my BMI was over 40. No shit. I was huge. Huge. And I wasn't swole. I was huge. Okay. And, uh, I mean, I'm chuckling about it, but it was a real serious time in my life.
[00:41:55] I was very depressed, withdrawn, uh, all the typical cliches or stereotypes we attach to someone in that state of unhealth. I was living it. That was my life. And, uh, I got to a point where I was entertaining death. You know, I actually had suicidal thoughts. I was like, man, I don't want to keep living.
Vit Muller: [00:42:12] It's a big problem. Isn't it?
Dai Manuel: [00:42:14] Well, it's, it's hard place to be. It's a hard place to be for anybody, you know, and especially I, like, I look at what's been happening in the world this year, you know, it's, it's, uh, there's a lot of mental health issues,
Vit Muller: [00:42:23] You hear a lot of teenagers, these days, social media and PR and digital bullying and a lot of kids.
[00:42:29] It's, I think there's some studies that there's even an increase in suicidal thoughts in, in teenagers. It's it's uh, yeah, it's not a good thing.
Dai Manuel: [00:42:39] It's awful. And, you know, back then, I, again, dating myself as I'm older than Google. As I like to tell my kids, I didn't have search engines when I was a team. Um, you know, we didn't have qcell phones.
[00:42:51] Uh, well, they were around, but I, I mean, I didn't have us in our school. Didn't have the luxury of having them. Uh, but. You know, it got to a certain point and I've shared this in the past stories where it, people would say, well, what was the moment where you just realized that you wanted to make a change?
[00:43:08] And, and, you know, it was when I realized that I was much more afraid of the finality of death, you know, this idea of just ending things and that uncertainty that that created. But also when I started thinking about my family and friends and just the potential that I have in front of me, you know, really accepting that I've got the potential to do, basically whatever I want to do.
[00:43:28] Like really the only limiting factor here is me and I broke down one day, like just lost it, you know, like uncontrollable sobbing, and just woe is me, you know, thinking the end of the world was now. And I, uh, got to a Point where I just started thinking to myself, well, what if I don't make any changes? What if my rest of my life destined to be as good as it is right now?
[00:43:51] So there was a very clear path in front of me and I'm like, I do not like that path. I'm actually very afraid of that actually being in my life. I'm afraid of remaining obese, but I don't even really need obese, continuing to live the lifestyle that I'm living and getting worse. Right. Because that's a realization when you start realizing you don't mind everything that I've where I'm at right now is based on every other decision and action I've made up to this moment or not made in my case.
[00:44:17] And then I started asking myself, well, what's my option. All my option is to do something completely different than I'm doing it right now. But that path was very intimidating, too. Cause I didn't know anything about it. So there's a lot of fear of the unknown, you know, that, that uncertainty creates a lot of angst in us and an inability to move, but I was less afraid of that than I was a stain as I was, you know, and I, I hope people really take note of that, you know?
[00:44:42] Like, cause if you think back on any of the major changes that you made, you probably got to a point where you're like, I'm more afraid of staying the way I am than I am of the idea of change. So I was less than intimidated by change. Like that's where I got to. I was afraid of both paths, trust me. Uh, but I took the path.
[00:44:58] I was less afraid of, which was the idea of actually making things better by changing how I was living. And so I went to the library, I got books on fitness and nutrition started to educate myself, started to just move a little bit everyday. My parents were very, very cool. They said, yeah, we're willing to support you.
[00:45:14] They could tell that finally, I was wanting to make a change for me because before that, They were trying to put me in classes, into sport and, you know, just everything. They would hire a nutritionist if I wanted it, like they would just do whatever it took to get me excited about being healthy. But I kept pushing them off.
[00:45:31] I kept, I was very, you know, I was a teen too. I was just like, no, screw you. Like, no, I don't want this. You know, like I w I was pissed off at them for even suggesting it, but I eventually got to that point where now they could tell something was lit in me. No. I came back with like two backpacks full of books and they're like, Whoa, what is going on here?
[00:45:48] And I was like, I'm, this is it. I want to get healthy. And they could tell on my eye that I wanted this and I meant it. So they bought me a mountain bike, you know? And, uh, I just started biking every day. I was it. I started biking and changing now. Eight. Whew. 20 months later, you know, I got into working out as well at the same time.
[00:46:05] And, you know, within 20 months I'd released all that weight grown up quite a bit. Cause I also kick-started my puberty at the same time, which also further helps with putting on muscle and leaning out, um, which could have been far more negative. Had I not started to incorporate this more active lifestyle.
[00:46:21] And uh, I changed everything and going through that process with people that were watching from afar, Even the people that were closest to me saw me go through this change. Then my mindset changed. My physicality changed just the way I was living changed and people were inspired by it. They also too are motivated, but this is the kicker.
[00:46:40] And this is what got me excited to do what I do now. And I've been doing for the last 25 years is people started asking me questions now. And you know, the kind of people that would ask you questions, and you can tell they're just waiting to talk again. Hey, they're not, they're not, you know what I mean?
[00:46:52] Like that was my life before that. Okay. All of a sudden I changed. And people actually, I could tell when they were asking me questions about, Hey, I want to lose some weight. Like, can you help me? And we would start to talk about it. And I could tell they actually were listening. Not only were they listening, they started to actually take some of the advice and some of the support I was giving them and put it into action and get results.
[00:47:15] And I was like this, I felt so good. I just felt so good. I got lit up. I was just like, man, this is amazing. I want to do this all the time. And that's what got me into coaching and mentorship, you know, it's age 17 and I've been doing it ever since lots of different capacities, obviously, you know, both corporately and personally, and, uh, I feel very fulfilled by, I feel like I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing.
[00:47:37] And, uh, so, so yeah, that's sort of the origin story and, um, yeah, I, I tell everybody like, listen, I didn't come to fitness naturally. Some people meet me today or they see some of my photos and stuff. Like I used to compete at a high level and CrossFit and, you know, Pretty strong dude. I'm like I'm six one, 215 pounds.
[00:47:55] Like I've got a good size to me and I'm pretty lean, but 10, 11% body fat. And uh, so people not to brag, it's just, that's a by-product and me just live in my life and people meet me and they're like, yeah, they automatically presume, you know, and this is why, you know, you can never judge a book by a cover.
[00:48:12] I always say is, you know, I never came to fitness naturally. You know, I didn't have that foundation of sport. I didn't have even people in my own immediate family that were into active living, you know? So I like people to know that. Cause if you're in a state of unhealth right now, or, you know, there's something you want to change about your physicality, it it's in you to change.
[00:48:34] Like it it's like, it doesn't matter where you're at right now. You can change it. And, and, uh, I truly believe that to my core, you know? And, uh, so yeah, that's, that's it, in a nutshell, you know, it's, it's. Just the choice at the end of the day.
What really needed to happen for Dai to realise that he needed a drastic change otherwise he'll never be happy Vit Muller: [00:48:48] Now, when you were that kid, was there a buildup to that moment?
[00:48:51] Was there something that sort of kept building up, like some, some something uncomfortable that build up to that moment where you, you got to that day where you felt like suicidal and then shifted because you said, you know, you said like you've been comfortable. You've been, I mean, you've been a fat kid, but you've been playing games and you've been comfortable.
[00:49:07] So what were the aspects that sort of led to this?
Dai Manuel: [00:49:11] I was, I was comfortable, but I was sad. And I was sad with my uncomfortableness, but I also, you know, being in school, there was ridicule, right? Teasing and bullying. Um, not obviously to the scale that kids have to deal with today, um, which I'm very grateful.
[00:49:25] I didn't have to deal with it. I don't know how I would've dealt with it. I think my life would be very different if I had to go back and live through what I lived through with today's technology. I, I just, I couldn't even imagine. I couldn't even imagine it. You know, so that's why my heart goes out to a lot of kids today, you know, and, um, being that I'm a father of two teenage daughters, you know, I'm very sensitive to this subject and, uh, um, For myself.
[00:49:45] I just remember I used to shy away from any cameras or any opportunity to see my reflection like that. That's how low of a self opinion I had. Anytime I would see myself, I would just be disgusted. I hated that. I felt so bad and depressed and, uh, I just remember this one morning getting out of the shower and I couldn't, my dad was rushing me because normally I had this hack, you know, I get in the shower, but I'd leave the water on super hot and that'd be in the shower for a long time, because I knew when I get out the mirror would be all covered in condensation, fogged up.
[00:50:15] So I wouldn't have to see myself. I wouldn't have to see myself this one morning. I was rushed. I got out. And I locked eyes and then I did one further. I started doing the scan up and down and I just remember just this feeling of just like, I cannot stand who I'm looking at. And I felt disconnected because I was like, is this even me?
[00:50:35] How did I get to this point? You know, and I'm 14 at the time, right? Like it's just, and obviously I can articulate it now this way. I wouldn't have been able to articulate this at that time, or even in my early teens or late teens. I couldn't articulate it, but in the reflection and just thinking back on it, and now being that I've gone through in a letter, a lot of other challenging changes in my life up to this point, I'm aware, you know, and it was that moment where I was just like, You know, they talk about your life flashing before your eyes.
[00:51:03] Right. And I used to laugh at that cliche, but I've experienced that. And fortunately for me, it was just the 14 years to that point. So it wasn't a lot to flash back through, but, but it was enough that I was like, I can't keep living like this. I do not want to be the guy that I'm looking at in the mirror.
[00:51:18] And I think it was the first time. It really, really sunk in to be honest with you that it was just like, this is me and I'm here because of me. You know, and that's what also empowered me and was like the only person that can actually get me out of this. Nobody else can, it's going to have to be me again.
[00:51:31] So it's just that complete self-accountability and that. Stopping of all excuses, you know, and I had to start with just what I could do, you know, not thinking about all the things that I couldn't do, because it's really easy to go there. I think a lot of us get to a defeatist mindset where we're just like, well, I can't do that.
[00:51:50] So why bother right is the all or nothing approach. And I used to have that. And so I started asking, well, what can I do right now? What's within my grasp. You know, rather than thinking about all the things I couldn't do, I was like, I can't go play soccer with my friends. Cause man, I'll run 20 steps and I'm done, you know, like, forget that I can't go to the gym because my goodness, I'm not going into that place.
[00:52:11] Look at all those mirrors, look, all that weight, look, all those fit. People know
Vit Muller: [00:52:15] you rationalize all the excuses
Dai Manuel: [00:52:17] and you do you just start going through everything. Because at that point, I, I knew all the excuses really well because I used them all the time. I got to a point where it's like, okay, well, no more excuses.
[00:52:25] What can I do? What can I do? I could walk. And my parents were fortunate enough that I got a mountain bike and those first few times, I mean, every time I came to a Hill, I have to walk my bike up. But I remember that first day, I didn't have to get off my bike. I was able to ride those Hills. I could climb those Hills.
[00:52:40] And you know, that was within, under a month of, of cycling. I got to a point where, what was really, really hard that very first few days, first few weeks, all of a sudden, I wasn't even thinking of it as hard. And that's where everything's cemented in. It's like, wow, change is possible, but it's not only possible.
[00:52:55] It can happen pretty damn fast.
Vit Muller: [00:52:57] It just fires you up for more right?
Dai Manuel: [00:52:59] It to does it ever, right? I mean like crazy. I was on, I was like, wow, I did this. And that, this was hard before, but it's not hard anymore. Like, it's still challenging, but it's nowhere near what it was. And it was like, wow, this is working, you know, and the pants start getting looser.
[00:53:15] I start feeling better. My energy is better. I'm happier. Confidence starts to build. And then, you know, there is a motivator people often ask, they say, well, do you have any other sort of motivations? I was like, well, you talk about intrinsic and extrinsic motivations. My biggest extrinsic, that external motivator, I just wanted a girlfriend.
[00:53:32] Okay. I wanted a girlfriend man! And, uh, you know, and my friend, they're more into counseling and all that stuff, you know, they're like you just wanted, to be loved . I wanted a girlfriend, you know, and, uh, So I think back on it, and I just, I'm honest, I'm just fully transparent, right?
[00:53:52] Like I'm not, I've got nothing to hide you're here, but, uh, that was one of my being motivators. And, uh, fortunately for me, you know, I had my first major girlfriend after that and, uh, you know,
Vit Muller: [00:54:02] don't want to miss out, you know, those kids, those kids around the school, they all start to have a little girlfriends and they're like, Oh, I don't want, I don't want to be that single kid.
[00:54:08] I don't want to be the odd one
Dai Manuel: [00:54:10] I had to date up. And what I mean by that, the date older girls cause people in my own grade, they still always remembered me. You know, I'm from a small town. So like I knew these people from grade after grade, like year after year. And so they saw me getting bigger and I was just known as that guy, like the overweight kid in the class.
[00:54:24] So girls in my own class, even though I was changing and all this stuff was happening and they, don't never really interested. So I, uh, I was fortunate. I started taking some of the classes that had older kids in it and, um, met an older girl. And that was, that was, I was like, yeah, I'm dating a girl. Great hire.
[00:54:38] Woo. You know what I'm saying? Like another little boost, but, uh, I often tell people, you know, like if you can't change the people around, you just change the people around you. So I, I, I found new circles of friends, new circles of people to connect with. So, uh, yeah. Anyways, that's, that's, that's it in a nutshell, you know.
How is Dai keeping relationship with his wife fresh and still dating like
Vit Muller: [00:54:56] I like how you put up.
[00:54:57] I don't know, dating your wife. So you guys have been together for a while, but you still say you're dating your wife and there's something very romantic about, it sounds like you keep, is that because you like to keep things like, always like fresh, like, like you still like a perception of that still being.
Dai Manuel: [00:55:15] Yeah. Well, I'm going to be honest with you. Like, listen, it's not like it's dating all the time. W we try to, um, but life gets busy. People change. Uh, we're constantly growing. We're constantly being challenged, but you know, as much as I have a friend that he often describes relationships, you know, you come in close together and then you, you sorta go apart, but you're, you're sort of going at the same speed, you know, at times, and you're there to support one another as best you can.
[00:55:39] So if they're off trying to achieve something that they want to achieve, well, it's like, how can I support you in going for that? And vice versa. And I had a mentor I used to, I remember saying one time, you know, relationships it's about being 50/50 in the relationship. You know, and he was like, die. No, no, no, you gotta be a hundred to a hundred.
[00:55:57] You know, both people have to bring a hundred percent of themselves to the relationship. Right. And that shifted things for me. And this idea of dating someone. I mean, you think about that, it's, there's a lot of intention there, right. Intentionality in how you show up. And so we try to remind ourselves, you know, let's, let's not just be married.
[00:56:12] Let's try to constantly be dating ourselves, you know, dating each other. And, uh,
Vit Muller: [00:56:16] I like it. I like it because it's, uh, it brings the idea of, you know, any, any couples and couples out there listening to these and they feel like, um, That the relationship is skipped bit a bit stagnant a little bit, you know, there's, there's no more excitement happening,
[00:56:30] right. Just trying to bring it back a little bit. And I'll just think about that, your date, and again, go out for dates and just freshen things up a little bit, because that's when things sort of re bring you those helps you remember why you have that person in the first place. Like back then when you met them first time and everything was.
[00:56:48] You know, very lovely, lovely. Um, just do that again. You know, that might be a good exercise to spice things that spice things up
Dai Manuel: [00:56:54] again. I think so, you know, I totally do. And, uh, listen, man, it's always a choice, right? Listen, we've been together 20 years. Right. And we're in our 20th year together. So, uh, yeah, there's been lots of growth.
[00:57:06] There's lots been ups and downs and sides of sides and everything else, you know, but, but we are committed to that vision of. Getting old together and building a life together. And, uh, at times it's amazing,and some other times it is challenging. Right. But gosh, it doesn't mean we're going to quit and give up. We keep working at it and, uh, you know, so it's, I just want to be honest with you, you know, like it does, it takes work.
[00:57:30] that's okay. Nothing wrong with that diet.
Vit Muller: [00:57:33] Dai, I'm going to have to duck out, I'm gonna have to duck over . We're gonna have to go to gym. We've got a barbecue happening, but before we wrap up, I want to finish this.
One simple strategy to help you get started with your weightloss
[00:57:41] What would you say to somebody looking to, to make that change? Somebody who's. Perhaps a overweight and, and still haven't sort of made the decision.
[00:57:53] But it's sort of looking and knows that needs to make a change. What is, one simple strategy start with,
Dai Manuel: [00:57:59] you know, the easiest strategy with change, you know, in any sort of conversation on this is just recognize that change is always happening, right? Like it's always happening whether you want it to or not.
[00:58:11] And becoming someone that's more of a, you become more proactive in the, the change itself. What I mean by that is like, rather than constantly pushing it away, start to embrace it, you know, uh, it starts to get excited about it. Start to, to choose change. Right. It's a much better energy when we start looking at change that way, rather than trying to fight it and be negative.
[00:58:37] Cause I know when I started to shift my energy to more positive, you know, it's like this power of choice. It's like, even like sometimes, you know, my clients they'll say like, no, I got to work out today. I really have to work out today. It's like, you choose to work out today. You get to work out today. You know, like my goodness.
[00:58:57] Change your perspective want to work out today? Yeah. But also think about this. Like what do you regret? We often regret things that we didn't do, you know, or things that maybe we felt we didn't do well enough and we could have done better. You know, when it comes to fitness comes, nutrition comes to mindset.
[00:59:14] No one's ever told me. My clients never said Dai. You know what? It was challenging. I got my workout in. I really regret that I worked out. I mean, nobody ever says that, right. Oh, you know what I really regret today at lunch, I had a green salad with some salmon on it. No one ever says I regret eating that.
[00:59:36] You know what I mean? Like, Oh, I, I had an inspiring podcast interview. I listened today, man. I really regret listening to that. I think I could just kind of aspire to change my life, like, think about it. Right? Like, and lean into that energy. You know, that be grateful that you can lean into that. And in embracing that man, good things happen, they just happen.
[00:59:56] And, uh, yeah, that's what I want to leave you with. And, and if people need a kick in the pants, uh, I have size 12 feet. Trust me when this foot connects with your bum virtually, or literally you'll get motivated to at least start moving. And, uh, and I always welcome that. So I invite people, reach out to me on, uh, on Instagram or Facebook and just say, Hey, I need a little bit of motivation right now.
[01:00:17] Uh, kick me and I'll know exactly what mean. And, uh, and I'm happy.
Dai's details if you want to get in touch
Vit Muller: [01:00:22] I love it. I love it. Dai how can people find you?
Dai Manuel: [01:00:25] Uh, people can find me just search my name Dai Manuel. Well, uh, it's the cool thing about having a unique name? I have all my own name, uh, as social handles and all of the social networks that I'm on.
[01:00:35] I'm most active on Facebook and Instagram. Uh, but also my website is just daimanuel.com. There's a or 1500 resources there now. Uh, articles, resources, content, uh, free information, uh, really all geared towards improving your life. So, uh, feel free, consume it, dive in, but just remember whatever you read and wherever you take on, actually apply it to your life.
[01:00:58] You know, like even if today our conversation, if there was one thing that you can take away and apply, do it. I mean, you'll be that much better. Right. You'll see that gradual, that little 1% improvement is huge. Yeah. And it just, that's it
Vit Muller: [01:01:13] just to comment on your website, your website is amazing. You've got, like you said, you've got so many amazing resources, but man, your marketing game, your online marketing game, that's a whole another ball game.
[01:01:24] I actually had a, I actually had a couple of questions. I wanted to ask you and have a little bit of a conversation about that. But. I think we would just have to spend another hour. So I'd have to look at for another one, but we've got so many what we call or we've got relationship. We covered weight loss. We covered. Uh, freedom lifestyle, minimalism.
Dai Manuel: [01:01:43] everything, man.
Vit Muller: [01:01:45] It's been amazing. I'm really looking forward to, to, to post production, editing it up. I'm going to put everything in the show notes, guys. Um, it's going to be timestamps so you can look and go straight to the thing that you want to listen to most.
[01:01:56] Dai. It's been amazing to have you on the show. I look forward to you again. Hopefully we can find some time
Dai Manuel: [01:02:02] do it and, uh, might have to be post-baby, but either way, congratulations again, on that little button coming your way. And, uh, I can't wait to see the updates and, uh, we see you welcome that beautiful bundle into this world.
[01:02:13] Cause I'll tell you everything. Yeah.
Vit Muller: [01:02:14] Changes. I'm very excited about that.
Dai Manuel: [01:02:18] Cool. Take care brother.